Thursday, July 24, 2008

Clarification

OK. About the "I am so sad" part below. It's not ONLY because of the Jerk (yes, the "Boyfriend" does not seem to do it for me at the moment, nor does it seem to be applicable). I also got two big pieces of news this week (so far):

One: they are cutting 15% off the employee-base in my group. All I can say is: "Please, God. Not again. Please don't let it happen again". I am freaking out.

Two: My test results came back "abnormal". I must go in for more tests, "just to rule out cancer", or something like that. I don't quite remember what the doctor said, as I am blacking it out.

So there. It's not just because of ONE stupid guy, and I am trying not to take it personally, but I cannot help but wonder what role I played in this stupid relationship going to the shitters. Because, of course, I blame myself. What else is there to do? Yes, I am freaking out indeed.